Hello again, Here on the other side of Christmas and the New Year from my first blog, and we are almost to grips with it being 2023 now and things are starting to get 'back to normal' for many of us. By now, some will have set and be sticking to their New Year's resolutions (congratulations to you!), however more commonly, many of them will have already been abandoned. There is a high percentage of resolutions that don't stick, but just because they don't, it does not mean that our goals are unachievable. But rather than talking about how to achieve goals, I want to talk about what happens in our mind, and what can happen in our minds before that. We can sit on goals for years before we take action, and I'd like to help with accelerating that process. Most, if not all, of us have areas of our lives and / or ourselves within which we desire change. Some people believe those changes are out of their control. Other people believe they are fully responsible for the changes they wish to make. The truth actually lies somewhere in the middle, but erring towards the latter mind set. (Determining your locus of control can be very valuable.)
It starts with how we approach the situation we wish to be different.
Commonly, we hear statements such as "I've tried every diet there is and nothing worked, so there's no point in trying to lose weight anymore". Or "everything I do seems to go wrong" or "I can't..." or "I'm not allowed to..." and on and on. These are all disempowering statements and while they might feel very true in the moment, very often there is another way of simply looking at the problems which opens up a world of opportunity. It starts with something like "How can I.." or "What would it take...?" or "What other options are there for my problem?"
As soon as we start asking ourselves what the solution might be INSTEAD of declaring an unsolvable problem, our mind (along with other people supporting us) starts to be able to assess the problem differently and more effectively and actually come up with solutions. It can seem truly magical.
In some cases, your situation might be directly affected by someone else. You might need someone else's agreement/cooperation for you to reach a goal somehow. If until now they haven't seemed to cooperate with you, it might be worth asking them the question: "What would it take for you to allow me to do this?" And, if they really aren't willing, then it might be time to ask yourself: "What would it take for me to accept this situation for now?"
I could write about this forever, but having dipped our toes into these ideas of solution-focused questioning, in the interest of brevity (there are hypnosis sessions dedicated wholly to these concepts which go further in depth), I'll march right on to THE MAGIC WAND QUESTION. Especially considering 2023 laid out ahead, let me ask you:
"If all of your problems were magically solved overnight, what would be different tomorrow? What would be the very first signs you'd notice?"
Asking one's self this question is a key step forward in clarifying exactly what we desire, in realistic terms, as well as shining a light on the means of achieving the goal, and highlighting inner resources and solutions. I'd really love to know the kind of issues your magic wands might resolve. So do feel free to comment here or to message me directly. And as I will always say, hypnotherapy questions are welcome here, as are hello's :-)
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